Monday, December 9, 2013

The love story of Neil...Part II

[This story carries on from Neil's conversation with me, posted a couple of weeks before, in this same blog...]
Today, Neil came to my place, since it is my day-off--so that we can have lunch together & some casual chat..
"I am terribly frustrated,", Neil said whilst slurping the Laksa, I made for our lunch.
"Hmm...and why???", I asked Neil--Neil doesn't seem to respond to anything, either he is fully concentrating on his food or his mind is elsewhere--inattentive.u
"Neil...I asked you a question", I was a little pissed off, when he didn't seem to reply within a stipulated time."Umm, well, nothing seems to happen--professionally , in personal life--days seem to be boring, seem to frustrating---my co-workers are just another cuckoo--I am getting upset for nothing.
"Sometimes, I have nothing to do, nowhere to go...nothing to read....really idle. People are coming out of their "shell" & now showing their real form. People who I relied on most, are becoming too much for me. I am getting bored of Kent, the people around me, the place where I work...I need a change", Neil sighed.

Neil's frustration is obvious--he is a hardworking fellow, as far as I know--I have never seen his work--we work in different industry.

The Love Story of Neil

Part IV

Finding Neil's Own Love...

Last week after I came back from London, Neil came to visit me in Abu Dhabi. It's been longtime, that I met him. He came with his usual disheveled look--wearing a worn down T-shirt, a torn denim & God knows for many days he didn't shave (forget about his haircut even...).

After having lunch together, as I prepared his favorite, Duck, we were chatting over with some Port. "I have fallen in love again", Neil told me, almost like whispering. I was not surprised, as Neil almost loved many girls--but none of them were meant for him. "Who is it now?", while pouring some more Port and getting some more cheese for him, I asked him.

"Her name is Stephanie. We were in the same university, she was just a couple of years junior to me. I had a crush on her for longtime, but never mind, she had a boyfriend back then. As my moral ethics tell me, not to interfere when someone is in a relationship. So did I....but in the back of my mind, I intend to desire her.
"As years passed, I moved to Kent from Auckland. Though I had in my mind, little I could do than messaging through social networking websites, Facebook for example. I had a feeling that she likes me as well..but was never sure though--until I asked her out. Even though, when I would go to visit my family in Auckland on vacation, we never saw each other--all we could do is just text. She was also shy to meet me I guess or just was feeling awkward.
"Then came the day, when we actually met each other. I was really looking forward to meet her. Though it was not something special but then that day was very special for me. It was some unrecorded date in my calender in 2012. We had some coffee in an anonymous coffee shop talking about *our* work. And then later some fried dimsums in the food court. Of course, my eyes must have told her, that I am very much interested in her--to know her more, to desire her & to love her!! But what touched me the most, when she texted me once I returned home, "I had a great time with you"--it melted my heart...".

With my same monotonous tone, I summed it up with a "Hmmmmmmm" (people who know me, must be familiar with this ... :) ).
We finished our cheese. Time for some signature crepe suzette. Neil was really tipsy after drinking so much of Champagne, premium Bordeaux and  now some Sauternes as well....there was an awkward silence in the kitchen, except the occasional strikes of the pan on the stove.
"Carry on with your story...", I broke the silence.
"Well, I went home again after that in about 3 months, during Christmas, but she seemed to be busy. She was not in Auckland but in Christchurch--her family was there so she went to visit them. Well, I really wanted to meet her & express my feelings for her..but then just told myself, "Take your time..know her more. Know her well...you don't know if she is single!!"
"After Christmas, I switched jobs and moved to Surrey. I had a better job, better salary & better lifestyle. We were just chatting frequently over Facebook and would often feel like "She is my girl...". Oneday she was just ranting over Facebook saying she would close the account & kind of told me, that just for me she would get whatsapp! I dont know if she was just joking with me or really wanted to stay in touch with me.
"Valentine's Day came and I proposed her, alas through whatsapp"...there was a pause in his story. As you all know, when I hear such stories, I get inquisitive. So I asked him, "So what did she say??Yes ..or No??"
"Hahaha, well, initially she must have been surprised or didn't expect this. Or worst, she was not even into me--can be anything. But then she just asked me, if I was being serious. Well, I was damn serious to ask her, "Be my valentine forever..."
"But then loving someone who doesn't love you is like waiting for a ship in the airport. Back of my mind again or as you'd say, "The smaller voice within", was telling me, "Go for it. You will not regret. Chances are that she will be yours forever...". I listened to my heart & made every effort to prove it to her that I really want to be with her.
"In the meanwhile she told me that she needs sometime to think about it, as she was doubtful about my intentions..short-term, long-term, one night stand..or whatever it is. And then came the day that I was worrying about--what are the complications that may arise. "You are protestant and we are catholic. My father will never accept a protestant as his son-in-law. None of my family members will accept it gracefully".
"My heart just shattered into pieces. Though I was expecting such controversy to arise, but such excuses. Once being rejected for being a christian and now being rejected for being a protestant..what else do I need to experience in my life? Will the next excuse be "You are a human being..so my parents will not accept that. They accept only Martians!!.....", Neil toned down.


The desserts were ready to be served. "So, end of the story..right?", I asked Neil while plating the crepes.
"Hahahahaha," Neil bursts out with his usual laughter. "No my friend...But Gaurav, I take inspiration from you, whenever you say, "Hope is the secret of survival in human beings", I never lost hope. I was just being quiet for about a week & lamenting on my condition. And then, with full throttle I again started showing my affection & interest to her. May be, I was just obvious, but honestly a single moment has hardly passed without thinking of her. In due course, whatever was going through in my life, I was informing her. However, I felt like I need to change my job. I want to have my own family--wife, kids etc. I want to give them sometime. I must quit software companies & go for greener pastures. But then all these years, I have been wanting to know or get who my soulmate is.
"The more she brought up several complications to me, my love for her was just growing beyond. Only thing I couldn't do is express myself, that how much I love her. Her charming & mischievous smile, her soft cheeks, her luscious lips, her beautiful face, her tone, her tastes of music, her affection for me...and she as a whole human being--I fell in love with. Often, I would ask myself, "Is this the one you want?", when my inner voice will echo, "She is the one, she is the one and she is the one".
"As you are aware, I changed jobs from software to fashion industry. More money, better lifestyle. If I have to choose a girl--it was plenty...more than I will ever see in my entire life. But I was whole-heartedly committed to her.
"I met her again in October this year. And then we went for dinner together in anonymous restaurant. I enjoyed & I always enjoy her company. Though she was telling me get married to someone else, I know that I will never be happy if I marry who I actually never loved. I had the feeling always, all complications can be brushed aside only in course of time. Whilst coming back to Surrey, I asked her if she could come to the airport. She works in the IT Sector & her office was quite close the airport. To my surprise, she did & I gave her a box of chocolates which I bought only for her."

After hearing all these stories, all I could say is a loud and the monotonous "Hmmmm..and then?"
"Then what?", Neil said. "We like each other definitely. I love her the most & to me she is the world. I have a feeling that her arrival in my life is the dawn of my fortune and I never want the sun of my fortune to set ever. If she is unhappy, I will be mentally disturbed. If she is happy, I will be so cheerful. If she is upset with me, I will never have a good sleep. I will always wake up thinking of her ...and same when I go to sleep. However, when it comes to marriage, I will not force her. I leave that as her choice, whatever makes her happy. At the end of the day, it is her happiness that is what matters to me the most. Definitely, I will be upset !! But you cannot change destiny, can you?"

Well, I agree with Neil. Sometimes our life, our character, our behavior is ruled by destiny. So what can I wish for Neil? Will Neil & Stephanie be together forever? May be yes--when two hearts want to be together, when two hearts melt for each other, who can stop? Will the Almighty be cruel & rude to them, if their love/like is pure? I leave that upto my Lord & my readers to comment on....
(To be continued.....)

Saturday, December 7, 2013

The Piercing Heart

broken-heart-red-knifeMy heart was hurting this afternoon.
  It does this sometimes but I don’t really share this feeling  with all.
  There are days when many things come to mind that make my heart not just ache but feel like it is being stabbed.  I feel like my heart is being pierced with a needle..over and over again. When I asked my heart why does it hurt...it said...


1.  I hurt for the past.
2. I hurt for the time wasted in my life.
3.  I hurt for being  feeling old.
4.  I hurt because I miss people.
5.  I hurt because I am disturbed.
6.  I hurt because I can’t help.
7.  I hurt because I wish I didn’t care.
8.  I hurt because I feel everything now.
9.  I hurt because of my mistakes.

10.  I hurt because I fail.
11.  I hurt because I have hurt others.
12.  I hurt because no one understands me.
13.  I hurt because I have no soul mate.
14.  I hurt because I am alone.
15.  I hurt over people I have lost.
16.  I hurt over being hurt by people.
17.  I hurt again because I think of past hurts.
18.  I hurt because I feel misunderstood.
19.  I hurt over mental illness.
20.  I hurt over the state of the world.
21.  I hurt because so many others hurt.
22.  I hurt because I fear there is no turning back to fix things.
23.  I hurt because I need a hug.
24.  I hurt because I worry about the future.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

My Gateway to Europe...Paris


"A walk about Paris will provide lessons in history, beauty, and in the point of Life."
----Thomas Jefferson.

I was longing to visit Paris since 2011(especially because I adore French Food & the Language to some extent...French women..well, to certain extent... ) & finally because of my work, my wishes (and prayers) came true.


November 29th, 2013
Place: Charles de Gaulle Airport, France
Time : 800 hrs (local time)

We landed and greeted with a lots of "Bienvenue", "Au Revoir" & finally a arrive Paris. It was freaking cold (yes..at 6 deg C, way cooler than where I live in or belong to). I was dead tired & first thought of retiring for the day, but then I am in Paris for about 24 hours--I will not let this chance go away. After a quick shower, messaged my buddy in Paris, a local frenchie, Robinson. Robinson is originally from D'Auvergne currently working in Paris & we worked together in Dubai.

Best Croissants I ever had..
About 1030 hrs
I just went to check out how to go to Paris proper (I was being put up in Roissy) & also found out croissants for us.After having those deliciously & heavenly croissants I headed off to Roissypole and from there bought a day pass for all the metro/underground--can be used all throughout Paris. Price- Euro 22.30
It was great to see around once in the metro as in some parts it was actually above the ground--could see the beautiful countryside. Europe is truly beautiful. If Asia is Male, Europe is its other half--truly female!!

About 1200 hours
I reached St.Michel & after getting out from the metro, the place I was looking for was Fontaine St. Michel. The weather was freezing cold (didn't I say 6 degrees and drizzling) & place was so, so beautiful. Inside, my happiness new bounds. Yes, I am in Paris--FINALLY!
I was just roaming around only to hope if people speak in English. My french comprises only a handful of french words--I understand too little french, so my only resort was "Parlez vous anglais?" (Do you speak English?) & if they speak a little, i.e. "Un peut", perfect, "Monsieur, where is Fontaine St. Michel?". It was nice to walk on the streets of Paris--its lanes, alleys ...so, so nice!!
About 1330 hours
My friend showed up finally. But by then, I was very very hungry...Lets go lunch.
It was not an ordinary lunch--as my friend promised he popped up a very nice bottle of Moet et Chandon Brut. Life is Good!!
My starters were Frog Legs (not so tasty, and quite dry) while Robinson had Terrine de Boeuf (Beef Terrine and nice). Main courses--I had a decadent steak tartare (tasty and less salty with frites) whilst Robinson had Magret (i.e. Duck breast with pepper sauce & mash). I was too full & too high--else I was craving for some cheese! No wonder when it comes to gastronomy, France should rule the world (Or I am just being partial cause I adore French cuisine...I dont know!! ).
About 1500 hours
After having spent a good time in the cafe while having our lunch & chatting with Robinson about different affairs of life, we decided to head off to Notre Dame. Yes, does it remind you of "Hunchback of Notre Dame" by Victor Hugo?
This magnificent architecture, "Notre dame de paris" (or Our Lady of Paris), a cathedral still stands strong for over 600 years & characterises french Gothic style & built along the beautiful river Seine.
About 1600 hours
It started getting dark. We headed to Au Bon Marche (Literally, Nice Market) & was amazed to see a supermarket keeping premium fresh products. Wonderful..Foie gras, many types of oysters, jumbo sized prawns & yes an amazing collection of wines. Nice..nice!!I just bought two things for myself--Pain d'Epice & Piquillo--something that I dont get in Abu Dhabi.
About 1630 hours
So beautiful...no??
We headed off to Madeleine--to see more of Paris. More chic, more elegant. Somehow, it just reminded me of my city--Calcutta (or Kolkata, the way you like to call it!! ). Anyways, we just checked in & out stores. Wonderful stuff & then headed to a shop called "Maison de Whiskey", or House of Whiskey. It has an amazing collection of whiskeys--scotch, bourbon, tenessee, single malt & also houses some liquors from the carribbean. My friend being a connoisseur of whiskey bought a bottle of ... (dont remember!! ).
About 1730 hours
Its now time to explore more of Paris. And it was completely dark then. So, we then headed off to Champs Elyssee followed by Arc du Triomphe (Arch of Victory! )
To my awe, Champs Elyssee was amazingly beautiful and on the same lane stood afar, with all its glory, Arc de Triomphe. Robinson & I was walking towards Arc du Triomphe and all of a sudden felt Christmas is around the corner..so many stalls selling all winter goodies, foods & yes, vin chaud (the french version of mulled wine), when all of a sudden there were glimpses of the beautiful Eiffel Tower.
About 1800 hours
We took the metro again just to go La Tour Eiffel.
And there she stood for about 125 years, the magnificent architecture Eiffel Tower. A travel to paris is just incomplete if Eiffel tower is not
Decadent snails
visited I think. But by then, I was dead tired.So I said Au Revoir to Eiffel Tower and wanted to head back home!!
About 2000 hours
I reached home..very, very hungry. So I went to eat in the hotel restaurant. My starter was Snails (or Escargots as you would say in french) with mushrooms ...very very tasty followed by a rossini style beef tenderloin cooked the french way "Saignant"--damn good!!

The following morning I left for Abu Dhabi.

Walking through the streets of Paris, I fell in love with the city. Perhaps, after my hometown, I will be emotionally connected only with Paris. So gorgeous & so beautiful. Sometimes, I wish why wasn't I born in Paris? If I am to born again, my earnest wish to my creator will be, "Can I have the pleasure of enjoying the beautiful from birth to death?"

P.S.- I cannot wait to go to Paris again...J'aime Paris!! Bisous....

Saturday, November 9, 2013

It was only for 5 years!



It was only for 5 years…and yes I knew it was going to be over soon…
If I am a morning person or late night person, it just depends on my schedule for the last few weeks. So, today also I wake up early, as my body pretends to go to work & do some *cooking*. But alas, from today onwards I won’t be cooking anymore. Lunch, dinner or breakfast buffet, ala carte—it is a freedom from all the slogging in the kitchen. The relation was bittersweet—but then, it is time to say goodbye to my love, without who I never imagined of doing something else
Let me get to the point. I am done with working in hotel kitchens. It was for about 5 years (only???). And yes, I will be still cooking …but high above the sky & for selected people only. I quite clearly remember the day I started working in the kitchens, esp., since it started in Grand Hyatt, Mumbai, India. My profile was a “commis chef” with a salary of almost US$1000 (Rs. 5500) & meals while on duty (no other benefits provided! ). I didn’t have a house in Mumbai, so it ended up in living on rent, for which I had to shell out almost US$750(Rs. 3500)a month, mostly it ended up being my mother sending me money, than I save something for home.
As many people will tell me, looking at my changing tendencies, “you are a butterfly!” , I had to look for jobs on the first month itself. In about four weeks, I had an interview in the newly opened Four Seasons Hotel, in Mumbai. It was a long interview & well, I didn’t get through. One of my many goals were to work out of India (no matter where possible). So, I started applying wherever I could. So, I landed up with my first offer abroad…Atlantis in the Palm Jumeirah, Dubai, UAE. I saw it as a fantastic opportunity & immediately resigned once I signed the offer letter.
However, God had some other plans. Recession hit Dubai & rest was history…
**Fast Forward to February 2009**
Got an Interview in Chennai with ITC Chola Sheraton. Got the offer & soon I got bored there. Secondly, the executive was just too much for me..I left that job in October, in search of greener pastures. And two of my dreams got materialized. Dream Number One- Got an opportunity to work out of country, in Dubai, UAE. Dream Number two- Career opportunity to work in World’s Number 1 Luxury brand, Ritz Carlton.
The start with Ritz Carlton was good. Different people from across the world (the dominion were mostly Indians) & lots to learn. And yes, my initial assignment was taking care of breakfast for 138 rooms. When I joined, it was busy as hell with 100% occupancy (and sometimes oversold!)—the visitors mostly Russians (since it is a beach property) & also Europeans.
“Dobroe Utro”…well what is the lady talking about?
“Da”…ok, I have no idea about that…or even “Aaamliyette”…
Understanding Russians (who seldom communicate in English) was the tough job, while working in the egg station. And then, it was Germans, French & many nationalities. I loved to interact with people to learn more about their culture, language, etiquette etc etc.!
After 7 months in breakfast, I got the opportunity to work in ala carte section—Lobby Lounge Kitchen, but as the kitchen rule goes..we are flexible. “If you have nothing to do upstairs, come down to the main kitchen”, was the unsaid order. Otherwise, come early to work—without any compensation. I did all, I tried all—but life was losing its meaning. Work, Home, Sleep and Work—was like a daily routine. My partner in crime for my day offs used to be Eric Gozal, an Indonesian –to tag along on day offs for movies, hanging around or just anything else to do. I love Asians (as I am an Asian too), but surprisingly, whilst I am out of India for almost 4 years now (47 months running), I have more Asian friends, than Indian counterparts. I love the entire Chinese community with its counterpart from Hong Kong as well (about that, we’ll talk later).
I knew that my time in Ritz Carlton would come to an end soon. I was looking for a change, the question that would always haunt me, “Are you growing? You are getting old…”, and soon an opportunity popped up. No, two opportunities. The first one was from Park Hyatt, Dubai whilst the following one was from Sainte Anne Resort, in Seychelles. The former was offering me a commis position (a junior staff in the kitchen ranking, fyi), whilst, the latter was willing to give me a chef de partie (kitchen supervisor in culinary lingo) position. I was not confident, to be a supervisor. Reasons: I cannot confidently clean tenderloin. I am not proficient enough with meat temperature. Otherwise, I needed to learn more skills to be a confident chef de partie.
The initial months in park hyatt were full of bollockings and I believe, if I have not received those, it would not have made me the person, what I am today. “Always work on the timing—the food has to be in by 15-20 minutes” was the rule of thumb while working in the room service kitchen, where I started working first.  Where Ritz Carlton was more into Core values, philosophy & ethics, I have a feeling that Hyatt is more into actions—work, work & work. Firstly, I learnt how to cook seafood (an essential for a chef to learn to grow high up in the ladder). Secondly, how to work with the orders of three different outlets at the same time (My opinion: I used to the call that same kitchen as “whorehouse” ) & thirdly, how to make a horse out of a donkey.
Here also I made a couple friends quickly. My first Korean friend—Michael. When I saw him first, I had one feeling—this guy is Chinese, he must be a chef de partie & will give me a lot of shit. So, going by my feelings, I greeted him in Chinese, “Zao An, Ni Hao Ma?”, but to that he replied in english. Soon, got to know, we have the same position, he is Korean (of course from the South, and not Chinese) and used to get shit rather. And even though he is back in Korea now, we are still good friends.
Ban—I thought he was Indonesian, but only to find out he is Cambodian (the only one, I came across till date).
Now, there was one more person, who I would always gaze at, just because of his weird *dress codes*. I didn’t him well, who he was, except his name. Though, I invited Cem, my counterpart from the room service, there was he tagging along with him. Ivan Ho, my first friend from Hong Kong and on our first meet, he was blown away with the pork belly, which I cooked on my birthday.
Perhaps, the turning point in my culinary career was when the then Executive Sous chef of the hotel, Chef Franck came and told me, “Gaurav, I want you to work in Traiteur. It is not confirmed—may be from October”. It was a heaven sent opportunity & of course, I grabbed it & didn’t let it go.
I had no clue of cooking meat, until I joined traiteur—different temperatures to cook beef filet (aka tenderloin), lamb fillet (butchered from the saddle), and different sorts of meat too! Never cooked rabbit before, so I was initiated to cook lapin ala moutarde –a French classic & a must for every Friday brunch. By the way, did I tell you TGIF is so apt in middle east  (but not so apt for those who are slogging their butts for hours in front of the stove). Every Friday would be an ass slogging session from 7-7:30 am in the morning, followed by the brunch from 1230 hrs till 1600 hrs & then later dinner service & closing the kitchen for the week (fyi, we used to be closed on Saturdays). So, then go to sleep by 2 or 3 in the midnight & have a long sleep 2 or 3 in the afternoon.
In the grill section I was literally getting grilled everyday—just because I was taking too much time to get the temperatures right. I don’t like to use thermometers to check the temperature—just go by the feeling with the thumb & index finger. “I have got to get it right”, often I would tell myself.
Cooking the perennial classic
Sole Meunierre
But my interest was more in the sauce section—I used to read, the chef saucier is always the next chef in-line to go up in the ladder. The sauces were challenging to make—in the sense, with so much cooking  & reducing, the yield was too less, but worth of putting on the plate. Duck jus, Lamb Jus, Beef Jus, Chicken Jus—and yes, shortly after 3-4 months in the grill, I was put into saucier. But this section doesn’t mean you would only make sauces. Aye, cook fishes, prepare all the hot starters, mainly, snails (with which I fell in love with), bouillabaisse (and I love it too!) and the French Onion Soup.
“I can just see a beef steak in front of me”, my boss would tell me, while tasting the beef jus—till date I am not sure, if it was a compliment.
Shortly, after running the fish section, it was my chance to be in-charge of brunch mep (and I must tell you, it was hell of a headache, mep=mise enplace) & same time, cold section. I have a love and hate relationship with cold section. I love preparing little stuffs, but mostly, those little stuffs are the most time consuming.
“You have done almost all the sections, and now you have a month left. I want a happy ending with you in the Side section with the gentleman (nickname for a colleague)”, my chef told me. I was really unwilling but then what to do. My tenure in Dubai was for only few weeks!

Moving to Abu Dhabi & stepping on to a supervisory shoe was not an easy task. Things were different compared to what I saw or worked with. Sorry to say, there were people above me with almost no or zero skills. Heart breaking isn’ t it? But I guess this is not new to me. I have seen people who are ranking high up in the kitchen, but when it comes to cooking skills, they are even worse than a commis. But onething I actually don’t prefer to cook—cooking for the buffet. And yes, hell lot of things to do. Generally, I was scapegoat for any issues in my area albeit; European but the senior had high expectations. I don’t know if I met any.
Last Day in Fairmont as a "Chef"
However, there was something for sure—I had a feeling. I had a feeling of not cooking anymore. The thought afterwards was what shall I do if I stop cooking?? So, by chance, I cracked the interview at the national airline of UAE as “In-flight chef”….

But I must tell you something; I really miss working in the kitchen, a kitchen which is busy as always, all orders lined up, with the chef screaming out to read the orders, the line cooks ever busy on the line & a restaurant full of guests!

Sunday, February 24, 2013

The Lost years of my childhood..Part 2

Part II
Something that never struck my mind was "What is death?", even "What is life?", "Where do we come from?" & "Where do we go?"
***
It was March of 1989, some random day when I was playing around in the kindergarten (and my last year in the same Kindergarten). Around 1230 in the afternoon, I saw through the window, my mother & one of my uncles talking to a teacher. I was just wondering, what happened--they came to take me--not to home but my grand parent's house. Reason: My Grand father was not well.
During the last few years, he was ailing--nervous breakdown (as I said, before, I find it more like Alzheimer's ) & finally he was suffering from Hepatitis B. He had a completely different lifestyle. For him, always eat the best (mostly heavy foods). Though 10 years before he had a major cardiac arrest with most of his heart blocked, little did that matter to him since he had never had any issues with heart again.
So that day, we came to grand parents house to find that my grand father was admitted to the hospital (fondly, I used to call him, "Goshaai" and he would call me "Sada shiv")....
A few days later, in the afternoon, I was in the middle of the room--the other two people being my grand mother & my mother. They were talking about something (which I dont remember...)however, I can still see what was happening with my eyes open/closed. It was a cloudy day. My father was in the hospital where my grand father was admitted & in sometime, we got the news that my grand father breathed his last.
His lifeless body was brought to the house for paying the final respects. I was completely aloof of what was happening, what I was wondering was, "Why was he sleeping when everyone is crying?". His bed was adorned with many flowers & any that dropped, I was putting it back, on his chest. And finally, when he was taken to the crematorium for the funeral, I infact found a couple more flowers & regretted for not being able to put it back ...then, I actually cried a lot...but of no reason. Since, I felt something must have happened, but then I didn't know what death is? I also remember on the 4th day of his death, during the final rites as per Hindu religion I donated an umbrella to him...those were my memories when my grand father died. I heard actually many things about him, but I wished he lived a little more..

Sunday, February 17, 2013

The Lost years of my childhood..Part 1

I actually don't know from where to start with. Will it be the one when I actually chewed down my grandfather's sleeping pills??Or walking (rather forced) home barefoot on a scorching summer afternoon, when the pitch was almost melting (I was just 3-4 years old then!!)??
Or shall I say when I flunked for the first time & got a red ink in mathematics when I was in standard 3 & actually didn't understand the "value" of the red inked number??
I was only 2 years old then, I guess

There are a couple of incidents which I remember pretty clearly & there are some, which I actually dont remember happening but I hear them as "stories" from my parents or family members.

Perhaps,the one that I can recollect clearly is chewing down my grandfather's sleeping pills. Since on his final years, he became a patient of nervous breakdown (I find it more like Alzheimer's now) he was prescribed to take sleeping pills.I was around 3 years old I guess when my mother took me to my grand parent's house (or "Mama-r bari" as we say in Bengali) and I was just playing around. Perhaps you know by now that how found I am about sweets. It was a regular day & I saw my mother carrying a tray containing some tablets. One strip was interesting--9 out of 10 tablets were white & one was red in colour. She came inside the bedroom & put the tray on top of the television (so as to keep it away from my reach). As soon as she left the room, I got myself a chair, climbed upon & wanted to eat that "most interesting tablet", wondering it must be something sweet. But to my surprise it was bitter in taste. I was like "eww" crying to my mom what I ate. My grandmother who was preparing for lunch, was terribly upset & gave a hard blow on my back, "Why do you do all these here?". They knew that I just chewed down a sleeping pill!!
My mother took me the family physician, who told not to panic, "He will just sleep a lot, nothing to worry. However, if you really want, can take him to the hospital to pump the medicine out". But then...I quite actually didn't fall asleep..
***
There is another incident which I must share with you. The first day of my school when I was admitted to the kindergarten. It was a great day--I met a lot of people & friends (and also my childhood crush I may say, about who I have no clue anymore!!)But when my mother came to pick me up, she was surprised!! I actually took my *shorts* off, threw the shoe laces away & I had a small box--which I broke completely. Well, it was taken care of, however, I had this daily ritual of throwing shoe laces away. Still, I don't know, why I used to do that, but I completely see myself throwing it away in the afternoon (It was my mother who used to tie my shoelaces..and not me!). It was really problematic for her everyday as she had to find a pair of shoelaces every day! So one day she decided to punish me.
It was a scorching afternoon of summer. As usual, I opened my shoelaces & threw it out of the window. Once she picked me up from the school she told me to open my shoes in the middle of the road. I was quite surprised as how I would walk barefoot when the pitch was almost melting. And once I started walking, I started crying out loud, "I will never open my shoelaces again..I will never" & walk for about sometime till we reached home. Our neighbor hearing my loud cry came out to see why was I crying & on finding out the reason ridiculed my mother. They immediately got some ice water for me, to dip my feet. I actually didn't open my shoelaces again. Such was my mother' punishment (which were very tough I must say) when I was only 3.5 years old..

More stories to come...

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

V-Day--Cooking for your love (or my love too ;) )

"Wise men say only fools rush in,
But I can't help, falling in love with you..."

It is spring here again (though the deserts of Middle East have only two seasons "Not hot" & "Very Hot") everywhere- the season for the new grass, new produce & yes, season for love. And for some, this is the favorite season of all, mostly, in Europe where winter is harsh.

I was not even sure, that if I'll plan a menu for this Valentine since off late, I was busy with work & stuff. But then, if I prepare a menu, I make sure, I would rather cook all & gobble everything till the last bit. The only problem lies where I am just too tired to eat after the main course (and get drunk, if drinks included!!). So too make it less interesting, I just planned a small menu, which you can cook for your valentine (or me for mine or for myself even ;) ).

The entire menu is devised with seasonal inspirations for example, Beef is paired with vegetables of spring. Also my feelings had been incorporated in the menu, especially when I want to eat the perfectly cooked Salmon & when my heart is melting, which is further reproduced in the Chocolate fondant cake, in the shape of a heart. Without beating around the bush, let me propose my menu for this very Valentine' Day!
Les huitres declinaison- au natural, au gratinee et en raviole
Declination of Oysters three ways
Served natural, served gratinated & served as a raviolo
-
Saumon cuit au “sous vide”
"Sous vide" cooked Salmon
Fennel, Mustard, Tomato
-
Le filet de boeuf
Angus Beef Tenderloin
Ala Printaniere, purple potato, pepper sauce
-
Le Coeur au Chocolat
The Chocolate heart
Chocolate fondant, Raspberry sorbet

Wish you all a very Happy Valentine' Day!!:)

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Looking back through the year 2012...

"Always maintain a daily journal...stating what you did throughout the day and then make a note of what you learned"--which my parents always used to say when I was growing up. But as usual, I seldom paid any attention to their words, which is why, I dont quite remember what I did on January 1, 2012--the first day of the year. Was I at home? Or I went out somewhere...

Looking back at the year 2012, sitting here in my room on the first day of 2013, makes me think how did I manage to finish this year so fast! Year 2012 was real fast.

The worth mentioning events were, I went home twice in a gap of three months & that too during Durga Puja. I was longing to be in Kolkata during Durga Puja, since 2008 (I am out of home since 2008)...and in 2012 I was so much longing for it.

The year started off well, with my interest to search for the other half, but then...I was wrong. It was again some time wasted..Otherwise, merry making on day offs with friends--going to eat in a lot of restaurants (even those, which I never dreamt of/heard of ). Also work was going fine....till the Argentinian promotion hit the restaurant. It was a...err a lot of work..but then fun. Getting to know & learn a lot of things about a cuisine which I never imagined of cooking.

On the same time, cooking at home (my infamous photo album), my another activity off work also moved on well. Trying new dishes & combinations that I always loved to try & loved to cook at home. And gradually things just moved to the higher level, so much (especially from my *likers* of the album) that expectations were high. Just a grilled chicken or a pan fried salmon for example was not enough. So, when I prepared the menu for Christmas at home (alas, it was for me only) that I really had to think a lot before, I presented the menu in my blog, albeit after a lot of editing the menu itself.

In March-April, 2012, perhaps I got the opportunity of working in the most coveted section of a chef--the sauce section (or in French as you'd say Chef Saucier), thanks to my chef, who gave me the chance to excel in preparing the sauces. However, the recipes were based on the advice of one of my mentors, who is now well settled in France. In the sametime, cooking fish, hot starters as well...Umm, well, it was challenging but when my boss said once, "Once again it is proved that I didn't make wrong decision by putting in sauce section", I was relaxed! (I worked with different sauce recipes afterwards, but I can tell you, nothing like the sauces that I used to make, following the mentor's recipes--those sauces were like truth testified in every drop of the sauces.)

However, smooth seas never made a skilful sailor. And every work colleagues will never be super nice to you(which unfortunately, I always expect!). There were a couple of misunderstandings with a few of them, which made think again & again, whether am I in the right place? Sometimes, even felt like running away. But then, everywhere it will be the same. And secondly, these are just simple misunderstandings which we further complicate. So, I had to compromise with my own self, my attitude & ethics & just let it go.

 In July, 2012, I had the opportunity to visit home. I was super excited of course, cause I didn't visit home since Jan 2011. Which means catching up with old friends, of course my best friend (who had been my best friend since 1997), relatives, family members & of course my dear Kolkata. I also had plans to visit Goa, made a reservation in one of the leading hotels of Goa a month before, just want to utilise my complimentary room nights, thanks to the company where I used to work then!
I was just upset, to find out that the promises by my so called best friend, seldom kept his promises. Even couldn't catch up for 5 mins. So, with few others!! However, to my surprise, I caught up with friends, with who I never imagined to meet or even planned. Well, thats how it was!

Once back to Dubai from Vacation I had two options left with ...either find a job by September 15, resign, go to Kolkata for about a week or else, go to Kolkata during Puja holidays (about which I was not sure). In the sametime, I had plans for being in the next level. But what if the employer is not ready!! :/
Job search was hard..some doors were closed and some doors I will never open. Kitchen trials, interviews everything were on. Especially with a position I was looking for back then. Some people rejected outright, some called in for interview & then rejected whilst others offered my lesser than what I asked for.  So "Lets go to Kolkata during Puja holidays", I told myself, since I missed Durga Puja of Kolkata since 2008. Well, to my surprise, it was great catching up with just an *internet* friend in the virtual world! Thanks to her for coming all the way to airport just to catch up with me in Mumbai & staying through midnight. It was great to be in Kolkata during Durga Puja & to round it off in a sweet note, met a bunch of friends, with who I studied till grade 10-- and met some of them after like 10 years. Again, whilst coming back to Dubai (which was again via Delhi), met one of my classmates after 10 years, thankful to her for coming all the way to the airport to receive me on her day off!!

Well, back to Dubai, "But I dont want to do one more Christmas", was the motto of the year. So, job search was on, "By hook or by crook", whilst my boss would often ask me about my plans. I understand everyone's necessity since, he never wanted to lose me when business is up, restaurants are almost full & every night is busy. For another gain, will never dump my present employer. So I just promised him one fine evening, "Whatever happens, I can promise you, I will stay here through December 31". It was my calling, so despite I had an offer for a chef de partie position, with another leading hotel brands in Abu Dhabi. I gave a good, long notice to my employer & conveyed to my the then "future" employer cannot join before December 31.

As my notice period passed, life was different. I was taking my work with more patience, care & with 100% dedication & involvement. Just never wanted people to talk behind me, "Gaurav resigned, so he doesn't care anymore!!". Of course, people will say so, even if I do 101%!! What I actually didn't care much about during my 45 day notice period, was the people with who I worked. If they do or dont do, was not my concern. "I will do 100%", was my motto.

And then was the last day & my last evening in Dubai, December 31, 2012. The last service I did in the position of a commis, the last service of the year 2012, my last service in the company & last service in Dubai. It was a touchy moment for me, wearing the uniform for the very last time.
"Just be calm & composed", I told myself before the service start. It was a gala dinner for around 86-90 people. And finally the last service in Dubai was DONE!!!
It was just a great way to say GoodBye to 2012!

Now looking back at the year...well, I have gained & lost a number of things at the same time. I have lost my best friend, who doesn't want to keep in touch with me. Sadly, I hardly have very close friends in Kolkata!
2013...so, "You will really have a happy new year", one of my friends commented hearing my new venture in Abu Dhabi in the new year. I really hope that I will have an awesome year ahead. Life always throws challenges & the winner is the one who can accept it & always comes out a smile! To my critics, "Please go ahead with your criticism", as one said the other day when he got to know that I am a chef de partie, "Positions dont matter", well if positions dont matter, then why is there a hierarchy in the kitchen?
My well-wishers, thank you for continuous wishes & blessings & to everyone, heartfelt wishes for your continuous support!!
So, one step up with professional life is done (and many more to go), but now I should also think about my personal life...can I??? :)