Walking down the "Memory Lane"...Lycee

Flashback:March 2002, last day of ICSE exam
I was crying in my room...alone!!!
Reason?I had a good bunch of friends, who had been in my good times, hardtimes, bad patches, & also my enemies, my admirers, my crushes, my critics, my teachers & my school---I lost them all...its like Love, Lust & then Lost.

Summer of 1990--when I joined Lycee in their Nursery class. I was being a fan of "Anup Jalota" during those times, always used to find look-alikes of "Anup Jalota" & after returning home back from School, used to tell my mother "Maa, today I saw someone like, Anup Jalota" & she used to laugh it away...
Dont remember any of my mischiefs of those days...except throwing off my shoes frequently or losing away my shoe-laces, followed by a good *whacking* by mother at home, but *bad* habits die hard.

After a  couple of years, I got promoted to "Class-1", I became the *undeclared* & *controversial* hero sometimes...be it fighting with friends[though I am generally quite, peace-loving, calm & like the ocean...vast, deep] or in my studies & then started my frequent flunking in Mathematics. Perhaps I was never good in addition those days. In India, a failure in a subject is highlighted by the red marks[Elsewhere, I dont know!!]. I remember, in Class 2, I flunked in Mathematics--out of 50 I could secure only 24[ 25 being the pass mark!!]. Everyone was asking me about my results & all I could tell that I have secured a red mark in mathematics[by then I didn't know that the Red mark in the report card is infamous!!] & later when I entered home with my report card & told her about it, got a good thrashing from her....
Mathematics has never been my subject--I have always been afraid of this subject. Be it addition, multiplication or later, when Calculus, integration, trigonometry---I was afraid about it. I remember, in one of the meetings with my parents, my physics teacher commented about me, "Gaurav's round the year performance in the class is excellent but when it comes to examinations, it is ultimately a zero!!", perhaps I considered examination is not a tool for analysing ones studies.
Days passed on...so also I started growing on, moving on from class 1 to class 5. Till, Class 4, things were Ok, I was good in almost all subjects, except a few like Mathematics...but in Class 5, things seemed to be tough. Teacher was new, n a bit hard-nut-to-crack!!Somtimes lousy, sometimes moody & sometimes eccentric. Good, Bad & Ugly---I saw them all. We were also introduced to Science, by then a general subject. This time, again I flunked in mathematics, perhaps the difference was more than I could expect. May be 10 marks short than the pass mark. In finals, I passed again.
In class-7, our subjects were again split, Science being split into Chemistry, Physics & Biology. History was also bifurcated into History & Civics & so many....I tried hard to pass in all the subjects, but my mind was in *Games* those days, specially cricket. Apart from all these, I was interested in Numerology in those days---so I devoted myself in this subject, of course in the cost of my studies & then became fulltime in my school. One of my friends in class advised "Why not charge people???"
I blindly followed his advise & started charging people, Rs.11for a reading[close to quarter dollar]. Few of my friends used my services & paid me accordingly. But one also needs to face bad time...few of my friends[who were jealous of my popularity] complained to teacher & with immediate effect, I had to stop, & return all money & then the complaint went to my mother...oh..it was really horrible!!!
In my life, Class-8, I think it was one of the most devastating year. I flunked in as many as 5 subjects. History, Chemistry, Hindi[It was a 3rd Language subject & I was and I am poor in it], English 1 & English 2!! I could never imagine, such a disastrous event could take place. But in this year also, I discovered my first crush, but I could never tell. I could never tell any girl my feelings, as I am shy & secondly I am always afraid of the after-effect, if it is a slap???
Few of my friends knew about my crush, [though they promised me to teach 1000 ways of proposing a girl, which they didn't teach] but nothing came to my help. Perhaps, its due to my crush, I lost concentration in studies & could afford to flunk in those subjects. I have always believed that good & bad events take place in a chain reaction. You can put in the way of a circle. I appeared for the final exams, with all my efforts, with blessings of all gods & goddesses of our religion, with my Guruji-s blessings, appeared for the exams, keeping my fingers crossed.
On the day of exam results..I was really tensed. I can't afford to lose a year in the school. I started praying right from the morning, & then entered the school.
"Gaurav, please come here..." teacher said. My pulse rate increased suddenly....I was tensed..
"Here is your result...well done Gaurav"...Thank God...I could pass..it was great relief. I could make it happen again!!! I never found myself in 1 to 10 position in school, I have always been a *mediocre student* as per my mother.
The last few years in the school has been most happening for me. My rise, my fall, close bondage with friends, exceptionally close with Samrat[till today. Dont make some other meaning, I am still straight] & also few others. I also demonstrated my own powers on how to do politics effectively in school, & what not. But it was fun...
Finally, it was acting that made me famous in Lycee. In India, we had this gameshow, "Kaun Banega Crorepati", a copycat of "Who wants to be a millionaire", the Indian version, being hosted by Big Amitabh Bacchan. I gave this concept to my friends  & then I had to act as Amitabh Bacchan, & it was in the dialect of Bangladesh...some people commented..it was a "Blockbuster"!!!!We did it so many times later, but never as it was in Lycee... :)
Crush for teachers, crush for classmates & seniors..we really had a bigtime...I miss all those fun, as life seems to be pretty hard. In school days, those volumes of books, Shakespeare, Mathematics....all seemed to be tough, but it seems, they were too easy. Often I used to write a book on Chemistry...when I was in love with the subject, but the chapter of Hydrocarbons ruined all my plans. I often used to see myself, as a future chemist[my astrologer said I will be into research!!], never thought will be cooking...
My friends gave me a nickname "Einstein". Reason being solving the Physics problem in few seconds, before they could even start...but at the end of the year, as Physics teacher commented "At the end of the year, its all Zero..".
I never know why I couldn't make it happen in the report card. Samething in mathematics. I did well in the class, but in the exams, I used to "crawl" to secure the passmarks!!!In English, I think it was better in writing than speaking. I used to fumble a lot while speaking in English--being always afraid of telling incorrect English, gramatically!![Even I fumble now!!!]
Today morning, I was chatting with an ex-Lyceean in facebook, my close friend, Samrat, with whom I share almost everything....except our undergarments!!! & that made me walking down the memory lane again..Lycee..
Now many tall buildings are around that School..it may have lost its charms...but still its a school for me, where I can always find myself in a nostalgic mood. Perhaps, in the sametime, I loved & hated the school. You can love & hate at the sametime, when you feel for something/someone..when you are close to it..isn't it?

In 2003, I revisited Lycee, with friends on Saraswati Puja. My friend Utathya commented, "Gaurav, the days passed on so fast..isn't it?", I started crying..... :(