One of my colleagues was referring to a song in brunch yesterday, "Tears in Heaven" by Eric Clapton. He was telling me, "I like this song, it is so sweet, nice & slow". Well, I like slow music [No wonder, why Andrea Bocelli is my all time favorite], so I decided to return home & then listen to the song along...
Yes, the song was very touchy, and I couldn't hold my tears, especially those who I loved the most and then who all left me alone.I have not seen death[rather, not the ones that happened in front of me] but yes, there were many people who died since I was a child.
It started with my grandpa[my father's father] died when I was 2 years old, however, I have hardly any incidents which was related to him. Sometimes, I wonder whether I saw him, though there are pictures with he & I.
Then it was my grandfather [my mother's father], who died when I was 4 years old. I didn't know what was death by then. With my weak memory, all I could recollect, it was a rainy day & my grand father was admitted to the hospital because of his ailing health. His dead body was brought back home & everyone was crying. Of course, I didn't cry because I didn't know what was wrong. But when his body taken to the crematorium for the funeral, I started crying aloud. Yes, still, I didn't know what was going on.
When I was 7 years old, my grandmother left for heaven. Yes, by then, I knew she wouldn't survive as the deadly cancer spread all through her body. But yes, there was hope. I have very clear memories of the last few days I stayed with her. Yes, I loved her the most & her death left a gap in my life.On the morning she died, I was told, "Your grandmother has deceased". I couldn't believe so I was about to enter the room where was deadbody was kept. But then, I couldn't enter & started weeping. A day which I will not forget & even tears come when I think of that day, May 27th, 1992!!
People say, spiritual leader never dies--his soul always stays with his disciples. Such was the day November 4th, 2007, the day my spiritual leader, Shreemat Swami Gahananandaji Maharaj left his mortal form for the spiritual abode of Shri Ramakrishna. Well, he was ailing for months, however, I felt he would recover. But he didn't.
It was a Sunday, and I left for a team dinner[when I was working +studying] & took a bus for Park Street[The same bus which would go through Sarat Bose Road], where gurudev was staying for treatment. Once I boarded the bus, I got a phone call from my mother, "Your gurudev breathed his last at 5:35 pm". The time then was 6:30 pm. I got down in the same hospital where was staying. Yes, I was crying a lot!!! But then, I cannot write anymore on that day!!!
There will be many more deaths perhaps, which I am yet to see, but my question which I'll ask those deceased souls,
"Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would you feel the same
If I saw you in heaven?"
I am not afraid of death, but what I am afraid of is will I live fully when I die?Will it be full of flashback of a life, worth seeing before I die?Afterall, when we all are bound for heaven...
Yes, the song was very touchy, and I couldn't hold my tears, especially those who I loved the most and then who all left me alone.I have not seen death[rather, not the ones that happened in front of me] but yes, there were many people who died since I was a child.
It started with my grandpa[my father's father] died when I was 2 years old, however, I have hardly any incidents which was related to him. Sometimes, I wonder whether I saw him, though there are pictures with he & I.
Then it was my grandfather [my mother's father], who died when I was 4 years old. I didn't know what was death by then. With my weak memory, all I could recollect, it was a rainy day & my grand father was admitted to the hospital because of his ailing health. His dead body was brought back home & everyone was crying. Of course, I didn't cry because I didn't know what was wrong. But when his body taken to the crematorium for the funeral, I started crying aloud. Yes, still, I didn't know what was going on.
When I was 7 years old, my grandmother left for heaven. Yes, by then, I knew she wouldn't survive as the deadly cancer spread all through her body. But yes, there was hope. I have very clear memories of the last few days I stayed with her. Yes, I loved her the most & her death left a gap in my life.On the morning she died, I was told, "Your grandmother has deceased". I couldn't believe so I was about to enter the room where was deadbody was kept. But then, I couldn't enter & started weeping. A day which I will not forget & even tears come when I think of that day, May 27th, 1992!!
People say, spiritual leader never dies--his soul always stays with his disciples. Such was the day November 4th, 2007, the day my spiritual leader, Shreemat Swami Gahananandaji Maharaj left his mortal form for the spiritual abode of Shri Ramakrishna. Well, he was ailing for months, however, I felt he would recover. But he didn't.
It was a Sunday, and I left for a team dinner[when I was working +studying] & took a bus for Park Street[The same bus which would go through Sarat Bose Road], where gurudev was staying for treatment. Once I boarded the bus, I got a phone call from my mother, "Your gurudev breathed his last at 5:35 pm". The time then was 6:30 pm. I got down in the same hospital where was staying. Yes, I was crying a lot!!! But then, I cannot write anymore on that day!!!
There will be many more deaths perhaps, which I am yet to see, but my question which I'll ask those deceased souls,
"Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would you feel the same
If I saw you in heaven?"
I am not afraid of death, but what I am afraid of is will I live fully when I die?Will it be full of flashback of a life, worth seeing before I die?Afterall, when we all are bound for heaven...
